My thoughts…on stuff

Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince is coming out November 11th, and the IMAX trailer is out online, and I decided to share it with you. But before you hit play, I must warn you, this may be the single most mind-blowing trailer you’ve ever seen. Voldemort grows more powerful, hormones rage, the atmosphere at Hogwarts grows uneasier, and tragedy looms. Now, prepare for a trailer that’ll knock your socks off!

Wasn’t that the most awesome trailer you’ve ever seen? Man, Warner Bros. pulled out the big bucks for that one! There’s no way that they’ve gotten complacent with the franchise!

Hello everyone. Before I start, I’m sure you’ve realised the “Listen Now” button at the top of each of my posts. That’s all thanks to Odiogo. I seriously encourage you to subscribe to my podcast, so you can take my posts with you on your iPod while you’re jogging or engaged in some other form of battle with cellulite, or listen to them while wasting valuable company time. (C’mon. You know you do it.)

Anyways, as you can figure out by the widget in the sidebar, I’m an Entrecarder. Aside from approving ads, I haven’t been very active as of late, so I’m trying to get back in the game. While dropping, I’ve read many blogs talking about Entrecard’s and SezWho’s partnership. Here are my two cents on the issue.

Basically with this new alliance, when bloggers leave you comments, they’ll get Entrecard credits. Simple no? Not so much. The comments that are supposed to be rewarded are high quality comments. There are two flaws with this plan. The definition of a quality comment and who rates your comments. Spam is easy enough to pick out, but you could spend hours commenting ’til your fingertips go numb, but whether your comments are justly rewarded or not is out of your hands. And most of those who comment won’t really be your fans. They’ll just be people looking for a credit. The comments will just be as empty as most of the traffic I get from most blog exchanges.

It also doesn’t reassure me that SezWho has made many partnerships several other companies, especially PayPerPost, whose posts Google knock down with a PageRank of 0, and I’ve worked for nearly three years to get a PR of 4. And forgive me for being cynical, but I’ve been part of most of the major blog exchanges, and they all promised the world, and they did deliver…for a while. I haven’t seen a single one of them that offered me solid, quality traffic. Even with Entrecard, my bounce rate is nearly 75%. But I’m not totally knocking it. I’m just skeptical is all. I’ll just wait and see. But in the meantime, I’ll get comments the old fashioned way. By writing quality posts.

I was loading up MSN on IE during some downtime at work (Sorry. Firefox wasn’t available) when I saw the article about the future ruler of the free world and the future First Lady being portrayed as terrorists. Quite frankly I was mad as hell. Though the New Yorker is famous for satire, and I know as I have read a couple copies while in my school library back in the day, I just didn’t get the joke. The Obama campaign has called the cover “tasteless and offensive.” Even John McKain said it was distasteful. When your political rival comes out and says “this sucks man,” you should know how bad it is. Though I think he’s smiling inside. And supporting Obama does help his image. Part of me still wonders if McKain paid someone off to print this. This is politics after all.

Yet another obstacle put in Mr. Obama’s incredible campaign. This doesn’t help his image at all. Terrorism is no longer a chief concern of most Americans, and Osama Bin Laden presents little more of a threat than the Boogeyman these days. But apparently there are some Americans who still can’t shake off that paranoia, and fear supporting Obama, thinking he’s an undercover terrorist because his name has “Hussein” in it. His name! My God! Are these backwoods retards so steeped in their prejudices that they’ll let a name stop the rise of a potentially great leader? And while I can understand the satire here, (I mean which higher level mammal couldn’t? Michelle Obama with an AK-47, Barack in Muslim garb, the American flag burning in the fireplace and Bin Laden’s portrait in the Oval Office? It’s just too much to be taken seriously) it only reinforces the ridiculous stereotypes that people have. And ironically, the title of the issue is “The Politics of Fear.” As for me, I’m a bigger fan of this cover than the original.

I can’t believe people are that people are really considering this. A Patois Bible is in the works, a project that will take seven more years to complete and cost JS$60 million. At present they’ve only translated 40 percent. For the uninitiated, I’m taking about Jamaican patois, a fusion of English, African, Amerindian and Spanish. This money could be better spent somewhere else, like building a school where they can teach proper English and help Jamaicans become more literate so they can read the Bible in the first place!

I guess they’re trying to capitalize on the newfound popularity of Jamaican culture. They’re trying to justify it by saying that the Bible makes more of an impact when it is translated in their own native tongue. Well I never heard anybody complaining that they couldn’t read the Bible. And if they can’t, they just can’t read. Period. Translating it to Patois won’t help. There are three kinds of people this would appeal to:

1. The Sunday crowd, who are normally so steeped in tradition that few use the New International Version much less a Patois version. In fact, they’d probably call it a mockery of God’s word. In fact, they already are.
2. Ordinary Jamaicans. I know this thing should cost more than a regular Bible because of its unique nature, and Jamaicans aren’t stupid enough to pay extra to read their own language.
3. Foreigners. They normally buy these patois dictionaries and junk like that, but only as mementos. None of them take them seriously. Plus these people aren’t exactly the godliest set. Did you know that 59% of Germans and 65% of Britons are atheists?

Whichever way you slice it, this thing just won’t sell. It’d become a collector’s item at best. This reminds me of when the Jamaican government spent millions to build the world’s largest football only to find out that they couldn’t enter the Guinness Book of World Records as the exterior material wasn’t the same as that of an actual football. Now it’s gathering dust in a warehouse somewhere. Just another big waste of money.

I, like may others, am psyched to watch The Dark Knight. Batman Begins was awesome, and I’m hearing rave reviews about Heath Ledger’s performance as the Joker. Some say it may even be Oscarworthy. But while we all gear up to watch The Dark Knight clash with his archnemesis, another joker is causing some trouble in the real world. Apparently there was a script for the Dark Knight written by Michael Bay that has been “leaked” onto the Internet. Find it here. One read and you’ll figure out why Warner Bros. chose to “take it in a different direction”. Here are some of my favourite quotes:

WOMAN (O.S.)
Sir, I have an idea.
We pan to a beautiful woman: platinum blonde with a huge rack. She is the hottest woman in the world, but she wears glasses because she is also the smartest woman in the world.

BRUCE WAYNE is standing in front of a mirror, flexing his sculpted, shirtless torso.

BRUCE
Let’s do this.
Cue AC/DC’s “Back in Black.” A series of quick shots show BRUCE gearing up: putting on the boots, slapping on the gloves, a brief glance across those beautiful pecs. Finally, there is no longer BRUCE WAYNE, but BATMAN standing before us.

BATMAN
Back in black.
Pyrotechnics erupt in the distance. Guitar solo.

RACHEL stretches against the open hood. The camera zooms in on her naked torso. It luxuriates on her toned stomach. Up it goes. Then down. Then up again. Slowly…slowly… Now counter-clockwise,

RACHEL
Alright, let’s see what I can do.
She leans into the engine, exposing her breasts, covered in perspiration. The camera zooms in and out on them, emphatically, a number of times.

And my all time favourite quote:

JOKER unleashes an all-out barrage of missiles, like the biggest fucking missiles you will ever see. BATMAN shoots his own back, and the all collide into each other in the middle of the highway releasing a violent explosion, and then, an explosion within that explosion. Afterward: one last explosion, this time in slow motion, with tanks flying out of it.

Both BATMAN and JOKER eject from their vehicles, shooting themselves into helicopters. Then they unleash even bigger missiles, which whizz past both of the helicopters, destroying the highway on the ground below. The action’s not over yet though, because in the distance there are still five ore highways and, on top of them, a bridge.

Is it me, or does anyone see a bit of Transformers in this “script”? And the funny thing is, people think this is real. This is obviously a joke, or Bay’s either high on Joker Venom or totally lost his touch. In that case, Transformers 2 is out the window for me. And the funny thing is, people would actually watch it. Utter bull does make money. Why do you think parody movies keep reappearing like a bad case of the Clap?

It pains my heart to write this. Obviously from the post title, there’s gonna be a Dragonball movie coming out. “You got something against Dragonball?” you may ask. No, that’s just it. I was the biggest Dragonball Z fanboy back in the day. I think it was the first anime I truly latched onto as a kid. In fact, it started my lifelong love affair with anime.

I even used to act like them a bit. I remember when I’d watch the show and there’d be an epic battle between Earth’s Special Forces and otherwordly baddies and I’d pose like my favourite hero (or sometimes villain) and with a yell, launch an imaginary energy blast. Oh boy, that would’ve been embarrassing if anyone knew abou…oh c’mon! If people can get away with air guitar, I can get away with this!

I long wondered what a DBZ movie would be like, and I heard many rumours over the years but none were true. Until now. But my fears have been realised, and it has been made into a live action movie. If more of my precious childhood memories are raped by Hollywood, I’ll have to go to therapy. Why am I so afraid? If you ever saw the live action Street Fighter, you’ll understand. It made me ashamed to be a fan of the series. Nothing besides the character names was true. It was like watching a cosplay gone horribly wrong.

I would’ve preferred if it was CGI, as a lot of the things that made the anime great simply can’t be translated accurately in live action. I mean, how are they gonna pull off a convincing Kamehameha? I bet the creators would’ve liked it that way too, but no studio would be willing to take such a gamble. And trust me, I’ve seen some studios take some serious gambles. Why did they start it at Dragonball? Most people are fans of Dragonball Z. I guess they wanted to make room for a sequel. Why do I think that’s not gonna happen?

Here’s the plot according to IMDB: “A young boy named Goku seeks out upon his grandfather’s dying request to find the great Master Roshi and gather all seven Dragon Balls (of which he has one) in order to prevent Piccolo from succeeding in his desire to use the Dragon Balls to take over the world.” At least it’ll be faithful to the story. And another thing that shocked me is that Chow Yun Fat will be playing Master Roshi. (Oh, how the great have fallen.) Well, it’s scheduled to come out April 2009, so make up your minds then. It’s too late for me though.

Happy 4th of July weekend guys! (Well it ain’t so happy under Bush is it?) To celebrate, I’m posting this awesome video I found over the weekend, depicting the battle for Independence, 300 style!

This cracked me up when I read it. Apparently a group of San Franciscans called the Presidential Memorial Commission are out to rename a local sewage plant the George W. Bush Sewage Plant. You’d think that this would never get too far, but they got 8,500 signatures, 1,300 more than the 7,168 they need to put the ballot initiative to the San Francisco public in the November election, and the city/government is partially supporting it. Makes sense though. He did make a huge mess of things. But damn! I never knew Americans hated him so much. Sure he  created a mock war for which scores of patriotic soldiers and countless civilians died and will continue to die for in a ruthless quest for oil and  deceived America and the world in order to accomplish said task, but that doesn’t make him a bad guy right?

Virginia-born activist and ordained minister John Rinaldi, a co-sponsor of the petition and unsuccessful mayoral candidate who ran last year under his nickname “Chicken John,” said the initiative would turn “every toilet in San Francisco into basically a shrine for George W. Bush and all his great achievements in his eight years as our commander in chief.” And to add insult to injury, activists of the Presidential Memorial Commission are asking supports to join in a “synchronized flush” - a possible salute to America’s greatest president. (Yeah. I’m tying to hold back the laughter too.)

Chances are it’ll be adopted, as it only takes a 50 percent plus 1 majority to pass it, and President Bush’s last approval rating showed that 70% of Americans disapprove of his work. “In 50 years from now, we want people to see George Bush’s name on that plant, and ask each other what went wrong,” said Brian McConnell, the Memorial Commission’s organiser. “We want them to be reminded of the Iraq war, and his other dramatic mistakes, and this is the perfect way to do it. “Lincoln has his memorial, Washington has his monument, and Bush’s gonna have a load of sh*t. I think a sewage plant is too good for Bush, as it serves a vital (though not so glamorous) purpose. I think they should take this one step further, and have a George W. Bush Public Toilet. What do you think?

P.S. Happy 4th of July America!

This shocked me to the core when I read it, even worse when I saw it. 49-year old Esmin Green died on June 19th after she lay dying on a hospital room floor for over an hour, ignored by hospital security guards and staff. Mayor Bloomberg himself said that he was “disgusted”. I wholeheartedly agree. It even shocks me more is that’s exactly my father’s age. That could’ve been him. This reminds me of that post Ricardo made about that old man that was hit by a car and ignored for quite a while. Here. See for yourself what I mean.

This is the same cold, uncaring America that my countrymen are scrambling over each other to get to. No thank you. And the thing I hate most about the video, apart from what’s already been stated, is that woman in the lower left hand corner. She doesn’t lift a finger to help her, yet when help arrives, gets off her fat ass and either orders them around or scolds them for being late. People say a lot of bad things about Jamaica, but that wouldn’t happen out here. Despite everything, we still have that good ol’ neighbourly spirit. At the very least, people would gawk at her lying on the floor, which would’ve attracted attention from hospital workers, not ignore her as if she wasn’t human.

Have Americans gotten so materialistic and apathetic that they cannot find it in their hearts to take some time out of their “busy schedule” to help another human being? Apparently, as this isn’t a matter of race, as there are many black people in the video. I hope the Green family sues those bastards to high heaven. Bet after they feel the sting in their pockets, they’ll never ignore a patient in need again. I’m glad they got it on tape, because I know the hospital would’be covered it up somehow. And imagine how many deaths they may have managed to cover up and get away with because they weren’t recorded. Obama, you’ve got a lot of work to do sir.

Hi again folks. It’s glad to be back online, as I lost my Internet connection over the weekend. The bill was long overdue, so it was a hefty sum. Due to some glitch in the system, I had Internet access three months longer than I should have. I would’ve loved to help pay the bill, but I couldn’t. Why? See “Internship” below.

Remember my previous post about Canada’s queer ultimatum? Yeah, I bet you do, as it was quite a popular one. Anyway, our Prime Minister Bruce Golding gave his response a while back. I just found the full interview on where else, YouTube. Like duh?! Anyway, the reason why I posted is that I found something very disturbing while messing around on Facebook. Apparently, there’s a Boycott Jamaica group on there. Gee, they’re taking this thing global aren’t they? Plus they’re pretty brazen too. I mean boycotting an entire nation? I’ve heard of embargoes, trade sanctions but boycotts? What do they think we are? Some little banana republic whose only means of survival is a few white people lounging on our beaches? Did they honestly think that we’d bow to their whims?

Well Jamaica is a lot more than reggae, weed and resorts. It is also home to a proud and extremely adaptable clever people, and trust me, if we lost money ’cause of this stupid boycott, you can bet your bottom dollar that we’d find another way to make money. We likkle but we tallawah! I’m glad this whole effort backfired and they’ve been exposed for the fools that they truly are. Our PM’s appearance on BBC’s HARDtalk should have also shown the world how resolute we are on the matter. And the ironic thing about it is that mostly Jamaicans have joined the group just to bash it. I did as well. You may see one of my comments up there. Plus in response, a group has been created called Facebook MUST SHUT DOWN the group: Boycott Jamaica, and the people there are more vocal than the people on the group they oppose.

I think it’s just an example of cultural imperialism, a throwback to colonial times. Britain set down our laws, and ever since she and countries like her think that they can dictate how we run our affairs. Get it through your head Britain! We’re no longer your bitch! Why don’t they pick on Middle Eastern countries, where they’re tough on homosexuals AND women? Oh right, they’ve got that little thing called OIL, and won’t hesitate to screw them over if they even think of dictating to them. Not to mention Ahmadinejad who wouldn’t hesitate to shove a nuke up their ass (though I know some of them would like that). In closing, violence against homosexuals is wrong, but we also believe in that little right called freedom of speech that the Americans constantly yammer about. And just as we have the right to say yes, we have the right to say no. Dun talk!